Personally I can't stop looking at gay pornography.
I'm looking at porn or the porn is looking at me?
The ego is afraid to answer: I'm afraid to say.
The sphincter is the ugliest part of the body
for many it's the feet the nostrils, armpits.
The sphincter is the ugliest part of the body.
It's like the tight chocolate smeared mouth of a child.
I've seen it on display, a mouth opening, as if to utter a word.
It appears again and again in the most cheap horrid sites
littered with ramshackle Russian porn, hosted by a man
known only as Yakov, though no one knows who he is or where.
Everyone viddys real horror show waters their hose cuts their cake.
Pornography streaks throughout the land and mind.
In secret people sing the word - debauchery.
In secret all the middle aged men/women are guilty
of a voyeur's lechery eyeing the school girls/boys sitting
in traffic jams, in the shopping queue, in a day dream.
In secret they change tab or window gaze or page
so wife-lover-dominatrix-psychiatrist won't catch
that bright eyed lo-lee-ta on the screen, in the school,
in the street, in the shower, on your mind.
Porn runs its long bony finger up and down the Nation.
Poor unzips the morals of millions of genitals and labia.
It's the last first temptation of the secret armies of midnight.
Pornography is to sex what the microwave is to food:
quick cheap and without nutrition
- au contraire, fast easy and so morish.
(Mess of a piece, much like the content, not sure whether to castrate this, or leave it as it is....)
9 comments:
It needs a twist - plus a layer of something else altogether. Right now it's just saying what every one says about porn but it doesn't bring anything of you into it or go anywhere - the key to this is in the going somewhere...porn as transportation...think it could be really good with not too much. Made mu chuckle that no one's commented on it.
Alternatively, I know nothing and it's grand as it is - or off with its head!
'Right now it's just saying what every one says about porn but it doesn't bring anything of you into it or go anywhere'
Harsh indictment, Rachel, I've never read anyone saying this kind of awkward honesty thing about porn but maybe I've just not read it. I'm in there by the way, just not so obviously.
I think it does go somewhere, from me, to you, to the secret voyuer, then summed up nicely in the conclusion. Mind you, it's certianly not Shakespeare.
Thanks for the indictment, nonetheless.
Why so defensive, McGuire? Do you think you're too good to accept criticism? Or just my criticism?
That wasn't an indictment. I apologise if it came across that way.
I like your poetry very much on the whole and I wish you well.
Yes, bit defensive, I should pipe down - I suppose the: 'it's just saying what everyone says' or 'doesn't bring anything' seemed quite harsh, but true as well.
I'm just a mediocre poet typing away myself, need to take myself less seriously, take on board your criticism, and improve.
Well, you have implied yourself that you can do better - to which I attest from last month's Rio.
It's difficult. I have written so many poems about gay porn that finding a fresh angle is not easy. Maybe I would stick with, or at least run with, the key image. You talk about the sphincter as the ugliest part of the body but do not dwell on it; maybe the dichotomy of disgust/lust could bear a fuller poetic treatment.
Just a thought.
to which you attest? You didn't enjoy my reading at Rio?
I don't mind this. It might not take on anything new. But I think it's states quite clearly what I was thinking about.
Work to be done. Nice to hear from you Chris.
Course, aye, there's plenty of room for improvement, by that I mean, writing more, and cutting out the bullshit. Honing the word and all that.
I loved it...
I don't care what Rachel Fenton says... I thought the voyeuristic part was open and true. Though, few are man (or woman )enough to admit it.
I disagree with Christopher about you not dwelling on the ugly part... you have... the ugliness of hidden truth.
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