Friday, September 12, 2008

Foolish Paradise

This is a wee surrealist sojourn. I enjoy writing in such a fashion, it's like a great big comforting yawn or stretch: leisurely strokes for a leisurely imagination. It seems to describe a kind of child-utopia, utterly impractical unreasonable and full of naive delight.

The Bananas on the Banana tree explode
like fire works bursting upon branches
they blow out bright colours!
The colour of Yes is an exceptionally
bright colour indeed like the colour of paradise.

The Apples and Oranges walk down the road in Autumn,
their rolling is walking and they walk far in form,
the leaves fall from the trees leaf hands waving
as they fall to ground they rest gust around,
fiddle with themselves eventually leave.

In Art galleries the paint pours from the painting
onto the ground and the people walk over the paint
and it sticks to the souls of their shoes
and the shoe paints their smile-print over the ground,
no body is concerned because that's just the way
these people are slack breezy walking about
with large glasses of orange juice chinking
with large ice one complains
the sun lasts for days and the nights cool
with breeze keeps them content.

In summer cars hover leaves talk,
birds sing and bears laugh
water tickles and every body has a body
which does wonderful things
and occasionally if you stop to listen
you will hear nothing which is perfect
the sound peace of calm air.

until a banana explodes upon the tree
and the birds adorn bowler hats
and flocks imitate clouds
jokes abound
musicians stir the dream
lost is found.


Jim Murdoch said...

This is not my kind of poem by a long chalk so I can't really comment objectively on it. Subjectively I can say that it's a delight to read. There's a lot of wonderful imagery and I especially liked the lines:

The colour of Yes is an exceptionally
bright colour indeed like the colour of paradise


musicians stir the dream

It has the kind of illogic that Brautigan gets away with in some of his short stories and especially in the novel In Watermelon Sugar.

A few quibbles: the bottoms of shoes are 'soles' – did you use 'souls' for effect or is this a spelling mistake? 'Fireworks' is one word as is 'everybody' and I suspect that 'painting' should in fact be plural. And I think you need a comma after 'rest' in this line:

as they fall to ground they rest, gust around,

You really don't post often enough you know.

McGuire said...

Good to hear from you Jim. I think I know why you don't quite like this manner of 'writing', quite simply it is self-indulgent. A dadaist imitation. Whimsy from the Borogoves! The central thing I enjoy about this poem, is the colour it brings to mind.

I wish I posted more on this blog. To be honest, I need a lesson or two on how to improve the decoration. It's quite dismal. I have every intention of keeping it going. I just need the motivation to improve it. (much like the writing)

pleasure as always.
I still read your essays religiously. Always informative.

Be in touch!

McGuire said...

Meant to add, 'souls' was intentional, but not particularly clever.

And yes, I need to work o my pluralisation! (Can you believe I'm teaching english to a class of 20 odd immigrants tomorrow. Dare they ever find this page and uncover of my dyslexic mishaps.)

speak soon.