The rise of the idiots - Nathan Barley.
My Dada is teacher at college
can't use grammar proper
and senior lady tell him
wrong-wrong-wrong, he snorts
like an Elephant feels strong,
roars like a Tiger in his private mind,
feeling inadequate but I say Dada
you is 53 you has had all of life
to learn the present continuous
and all the pins and needles
of the fretwork of grammar and
language, but he pats my head
rubs my hair, says he is busy.
And I think to myself maybe
on his tombstone
I will put a to do list.
4 comments:
This works better as a stand alone piece. I wonder if it would make a difference mentioning what he teaches? Surely not English.
You edited!
Impressive.
Reconsider the "you has" dialects and remove the bit about thinking to yourself, still need some phrase to replace it, I think, and this will be the first thing I've ever seen by you that isn't retarded-sounded. Will have a unified theme and a unified device--the child's voice--and while it has a rather obvious message and a moral it is a start that, again, isn't retarded-sounding. This is the shit you need to post, not that spam.
--Jeremy
"...retarded-sounded..." It is the heat, not the estrus.
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